The Cheaters
They want the kind of pity the Potato
Eaters generate. They want you to believe
Their desperation, in the brown colored cloaks
Their lives were hooded with. They want you
To feel sorry that they had only one
Potato to themselves and who doesn’t want
More and more and more potato?
Pretty soon, they don’t even know
Their own ground any more. They wake up
Thinking how much they prefer this russet over that
Yukon Gold. Look I want to shout. We’re all just as lumpy.
Look at the moon instead. See how it reflects? The marriage
finally broke apart when Mary started seeing Keith. Mark still
seethes at Keith’s name even though Mark is remarried and even
though he and Mary have been divorced for years and even though he’d done more cheating on her than she on he. When you’re cheating
on someone, you forget that someone. Their face is eclipsed
by your desire for someone else, for your desire
not to think too hard about what you’re doing.
But when you’re the one being cheated on,
when you lie down to try to sleep at night, alone, wondering
where your someone went, all you can see is the image of that person’s
face where yours is supposed to be. Mark imagined Keith in his car,
on the edge of his kids’ bed, on his front porch, on his bicycle. Keith’s face took the place of Mark’s in the mirror and now Mark can’t even
shave without his hand shaking. The face of the other woman, or in Mark’s case, the other man, is like a moon. Even when new, you can still make out the outline of its curve.
I want to feel sorry for the cheaters. I want to tell them I understand.
And I do, I do. I cannot say I’ve never tasted other potatoes.
I cannot say that I don’t like my potatoes whipped as white as any
moon but mirror looking in is a vast abyss, not a place where some
one can hold your hand and say if you weren’t getting
what you needed, you had to go elsewhere. If you needed to go
elsewhere you should have gone there first
and when you’re sorry you find out there just serving the same old potatoes on
the moon and you want to come back to the lumps you know, the mirror you think is
shaking is really just turning away.
Read Full Post »